Tag: dreams

  • What Are You Willing to Do to Create the Life You Want?

    “I want to write a book.”

    “I want to start my own business.”

    “I want to be an actor.”

    “I want to move to California.”

    “I want to retire.”

    “I want to…”

    What’s on your “Someday List?”

    You know the one…the one that has all the things you’re putting off for some day in the future. 

    I’m a wonderful procrastinator. My father used to say, “Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow.” (Yes, really.) He would say it jokingly, but I took his words to heart. 

    I had always wanted to write books from the time that I wrote my first story as a kid. I started writing articles and blog posts for no pay. I wrote for the pure pleasure of creating stories and honing the craft. 

    My first paid gig was for an online review site. I earned five figures from that site…over a couple of years. 

    I continued to write for several blog sites and occasionally my articles were syndicated in several newspapers. Chicago Tribune offered me a weekly column in the local section, with no pay. I said yes. It was fun to see my articles in print. Later, I became a paid writer. This lead to other paid gigs, like writing for Ricky Martin’s parenting website. 

    So this leads to the question, what do you love so much you’d do it for free?  This is one of the clues to your passions. 

    Then the second question becomes, what are you willing to do to create the life you want? 

    I wanted to write books. 

    Someday. 

    There’s a line in Billy Joel’s song, James:

    “When will you write your masterpiece?”

    I finally started writing. I got up at five a.m. and hit the keyboard each morning. I wrote after the kids went to bed. I wrote in between selling stuff for my sales job. 

    One book. Then two. Then ten. And still writing the next one. 

    There are three things you need to create the life you want:

    Clarity.

    Commitment.

    Action. 

    Get clear on the life you want, commit to what needs to be done, then take action. 

    What are you willing to do to create the life you want? 

  • 50 States for My 50’s: New Hampshire

    Deep in the middle of The Happiness of Pursuit: Finding the Quest That Will Bring Purpose to Your Life by Chris Guillebeau, I paused to contemplate my own quest.

    What did I love to do more than anything in the world?

    Barefoot water skiing.

    And just like that, the quest appeared before me:

    I will barefoot water ski in all 50 states to celebrate my 50’s–and to encourage, inspire, and prompt others to unwrap their passions at any age. 

    Maine and New Hampshire were on the calendar for the #Barefoot50 in August. I had planned to barefoot with Sun Sports Maine, but due to scheduling conflicts and high wind, I ended up at paddleboarding with my co-worker instead. Stephanie Olson and I had a blast. We were the only ones out on the water due to the wind.

    My first time on a paddleboard!

    After a speaking gig in Maine, I took off for New Hampshire to hang with Jackie and Claude St. Onge, the parents of 2X World Barefoot Champion, Keith St. Onge (we wrote Gliding Soles.)

    New Hampshire was absolutely beautiful and it was my first time in this state. In some ways I felt like I had visited it before–then I realized it was simply from all the stories that Keith shared when we were writing his book.

    Claude arranged for me to barefoot with the Leclerc family at their lake. It was a little windy and rough, but we all had a great time on the water. Claude is in his 60’s and he barefoots a like a teenager, proving you’re never too old to do what you love.

    Claude St. Onge enjoying the water!

    The Leclerc family, St. Onges, and me. I left the group too soon!
    A Gliding Soles fan!
    Barefooting backwards–my favorite thing to do.

    The three of us took off for Lake Umbagog in the late afternoon, meeting up with Jackie’s sister and her husband. for a ride around the lake while the sun was getting low in the sky. Lake Umbagog is a man-made lake which flows into the Androscoggin River. The name comes from the Abenaki Indian tribe meaning “shallow waters.” Indeed, the average depth of this 10.5 mile long lake is only ten feet.

    Breathtaking sunset on Lake Umbagog.

    Umbagog is absolutely pristine and many parts are completely untouched by civilization.

    The sunset was beautiful that night. When we arrived back to the cottage, we had a wonderful dinner with Jackie’s sister Collette and her husband, Stanley.

    I checked out the map of Lake Umbagog and learned that half of the lake is in Maine. I’ll be back to barefoot on that side of the lake for my Maine adventure!

    Jackie and Claude St. Onge

    We packed a lot into three short days and I could have easily stayed there for a couple of weeks. The area around Mount Washington is simply beautiful. It’s a soulful place. This quest has been so much fun–check out the gallery below for the rest of the adventure.

    Grab a copy of Chris Guillebeau’s book and begin a quest of your own. I promise you, your life will light up!

  • When Are You Going to Write Your Book?

    karen books

    “I want to write a book.”

    As a Passion Mentor, this dream comes up frequently when I ask people what their big dream is. Or their plan for the next year. Or the next five. Or their legacy.

    It always surprises me how long people have been carrying their dreams inside. I get it. I wanted to write a book when I was eleven. I sat down at my dad’s typewriter and pounded out my first story.

    Then I procrastinated for many years.

    The excuses bubbled up:

    I’m not ready.

    I don’t have enough experience.

    I need to practice writing more. 

    I don’t know where to begin.

    I don’t have time.

    and the mother of them all:

    Who am I to write a book? 

    That last one reminds me of Marianne Williamson’s famous quote:  “We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.”

    I spent a lot of years putting off writing a book for the mythical “Someday.”  You know that day; the one when the moon and the planets all align and I could magically sit down and produce a book.

    There’s a song by Billy Joel that haunted me throughout my college years, “James.” In the middle of my first year in graduate school, I wanted to quit. I just knew I was going down the wrong road. Three times, I came close to pulling the plug on my education. Three times, friends gave me every rational reason why I should stick it out.

    And many times, a line from “James” ran through my head and blasting through the speakers in my apartment:

    “When will you write your masterpiece?”

    Someday.

    And the song would repeat.

    James…do you like your life,
    Can you find release,
    And will you ever change
    Will you ever write your masterpiece.
    Are you still in school
    Living up to expectations…James…

    You were so relied upon, everybody knows how hard you tried-
    Hey…just look at what a job you’ve done,
    Carrying the weight of family pride.
    James…you’ve been well behaved,
    You’ve been working so hard
    But will you always stay
    Someone else’s dream of who you are.
    Do what’s good for you, or you’re not good for anybody…James.

    I had come too far down a path to quit. There was no way I could make money from writing. I had already taken a journalism class and struggled my way through it. I couldn’t do interviews because no one knew I was hard of hearing and I wasn’t going to admit it. So I failed at being a poor imitation of a person who could hear.

    Fast forward many, many years later…

    I’m working on my 9th book. 

    What changed?

    I started writing.

    I wrote small articles. Blog posts. Magazine articles. Newspaper articles. Chicken Soup for the Soul. 

    When I finally decided to write my first book, I got up at five in the morning while holding down a more-than-full-time job, raising a family, caring for a dying parent, and volunteering for a non-profit.

    So when people come to me for advice on how to begin living their dreams, there’s a process:

    Identify your dream.

    Write it down. 

    Begin. 

    If you don’t follow this process, you’ll likely drift through one day, then the next, then the next…until several years have gone by and your dreams are still sitting on the shelf. If you continually wait until the time “is right,” eventually you’re going to run out of time.

    And that book you have inside of you, it will never be in your hands.

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    Put aside the excuses. Put aside the time constraints. Put aside the self-esteem hurdles.

    Start writing. Anything. You can pound out a couple of words in ten-minute spurts if that’s all the time you have in the day.

    You will encounter critics. It’s part of the process. I can still remember the scathing words of a well-meaning friend who tried to change my writing style. “You’re too casual. You write like you talk. It should be more formal.”

    Writing like someone else is like putting on a too-tight coat and attempting to button it up. Let the authentic you shine through. James Patterson has some great advice: “Focus on the story, not the sentence.”

    Here’s the thing: done is better than perfect. I have seen many first drafts of published authors who showed their first pieces of work in workshops. Three-ring binders. Stapled papers. Tiny books that grew into bestsellers during second editions.

    Never forget, Stephen King’s first draft of “Carrie” went into the garbage. His wife fished out the papers and encouraged him to continue. Thirty rejections later, King received an offer of a $2,500 advance. The book was later sold for $400,000 and made into a movie.

    Even great writers throw away drafts that they think are nothing but…garbage.

    So, that dream you have of writing a book?

    Start.

     

    Want to try one of my books for free? 

  • Facing a Fear of Alligators

    At five o’clock this morning I woke up drenched in sweat. The open jaws of a very large alligator startled me awake.

    It’s not the first time I’ve had that kind of dream. Here’s how they started:

    Alligator Dreams

    You’ll note that this was written back in November of 2010. For awhile there I was doing great. Then one morning last year, Joann O’Connor and I were walking from the guest house to the ski school and we encountered an alligator lounging in the grass. My heart pretty much leapt out of my chest. I was just glad I wasn’t alone.  My first instinct was to run, but then I remembered a little tidbit I had read somewhere on the web– that alligators can run as fast as 35 mph (not true as I later found out, it’s more like 8 or 9 mph–huge difference!).

    To top it off, last fall, I barefoot water skied right by what I can only assume was a very large alligator, judging by the ripples left on the water as I skied by. The boat crew confirmed it.

    So for all the bravado I declared back in 2010, I’ve discovered that the fear of alligators is not something I can merely outrun in my mind. There’s no way to control the dreams except after they’ve occurred, and by then, I wake up in a cold sweat and can’t go back to sleep for a long while, even after mentally changing the end of the dream.

    Several people have suggested that I face the fears head on by petting an alligator or even wrestling one under supervision. I don’t think that will do anything to alleviate the fears, because the fear stems from the idea of being attacked in the water, and that’s beyond my control.

    So unless someone has a solution for me, I’m going to invest stock in a company that develops alligator repellent.

  • Turning a Bold Vision Into Reality

    During a lunch break at the International Center for Deafness and the Arts, I was talking to one of the teen cast members and asking her about her dreams.  “I want to be like Marlee Matlin,” she said. “I love her on the show, Switched at Birth.”

    The teen went back on to the stage to rehearse for Nunsense.  As I was sitting in the lounge, my eyes caught an essay written by a very young Marlee Matlin.  It was posted on the wall next to several pictures of Marlee during her time at ICODA.  Marlee began her acting career as Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz.  Her original costume was now enshrined on the wall.

    “If I Was A Movie Star,” Marlee titled her essay.  Here is the rest:

    If I was a movie star, I would ride in a limousine.

    When I go out of the limousine, I would give everyone my best autograph and I would let people take my picture! OOhh, when I am on the stage, I would give everyone my best smile! 🙂

    I would have a huge house which would have mirrors all over.  I would love when people would write me letters.  I would love to send them back but it’s hard to write to all the people.

    I would love to meet all movie stars!  They are so nice!!

    I want to make movies all my life.

    Here’s my autograph:

    Signed: Marlee Matlin

    I sat and marveled at the letter. Young Marlee Matlin had manifested every single thing written in that essay.  Every. Single. Thing.  And more.  Her bold vision had morphed into reality.  Nine years before her Oscar moment, Henry Winkler told her to follow her heart and not let any barriers stop her from achieving her dreams.

    She was the youngest person to ever win the Academy Award at age 21.  Many people wrote her off as a one-time-wonder.  But Marlee held fast to the dreams that she envisioned.  And today, she has four Emmys sitting on a shelf in her beautiful home (I’m sure there are mirrors on the walls) and she’s emerged from a limousine over and over.

    Perhaps anyone reading Marlee’s essay back then might have thought it was an impossible goal.  An impossible dream.  Randy Gage, in his post, Goals That Work, says:

    So if you have a bold vision, the bold goal will seem believable to you.  If you don’t, it won’t.  It’s just that simple.  So as to whether you achieve a goal you don’t really believe – I don’t think so.  Once in a while circumstances will conspire to drag you over the finish line.  But almost all the time, you need a strong belief in a goal to have a real chance of achieving it.

     

    What about you? Do you have a bold vision you want to turn into reality?

  • Find a Mentor to Get You Where You Want to Go

     

    Yeah, that’s me on the top left, hanging on for dear life as we formed a pyramid on Christie Lake for the first time when I was a teen.  My mentor is on the bottom in the middle– Brent Greenwood.  Brent is a guy who popped into my life out of the blue,  and he taught me a lot about barefooting and pyramids in a very short amount of time.  We had only spent two days together, but he taught me something that will stay with me for the rest of my life: visualize yourself doing what you want to do from the start to the finish,  practice it, and you can make it happen.

    Brent asked me if I wanted to learn how to do a deep-water start for barefooting.  I was definitely game!  He got out a rope and we practiced on dry land.  He told me to go home and practice it in my mind and we would try it the next morning.  Brent went first and demonstrated how to hang on to the rope and then get up barefooting.  As I watched him on the water, I pictured myself doing every step.  It took the third try to make it happen, but there I was, feet first wrapped on the rope and then suddenly, standing on the water zipping along.

    As I look back on my life, I realize it has been filled with mentors every step of the way.  When we seek out those who know more than us, we can learn from them and in turn, we grow.  Every time I have a new goal or a new dream, I seek out folks who have walked the journey before me and I learn from them.  I ask questions:

    “How did you get to be where you are today?”

    “What are some of the challenges you faced on your journey and how can I learn from them?”

    “What knowledge do I need to acquire to get where I want to go?”

    “What tools do I need to use to achieve my goal?”

    As a person who is deaf, the internet has been a wonderful place to find mentors.  Blogs, Facebook and Twitter have been the tools that I use the most to get to know people.  I find that people generally do love to share their knowledge– you have to build a relationship first.  Some of the most amazing people I know who have shared their wisdom with me, I have yet to meet them face-to-face!

    So if you’ve got a dream that’s brewing and you’re not sure where you’re going, find a mentor to help guide you.  Friends will tell you what to do, mentors will help you figure out what you need to do to accomplish your dream.